Mr Elite

So I joined a new dating site apparently for elite people… it seems the clientele is perhaps more in my demographic than your typical Tinder guy although most of them seem to be miles away! I’m really not into this long distance thing.

Last night I had a date with my first match from the site, he lived in the next city and invited me to his where he would then take me out. This seemed fair and I guess gives me the chance to work out if this guy really is as Elite as the site says.

I turn up at his having driven through torrential rain, and arrive about an hour later. He’s watching darts, which he keeps on the TV as we’re sitting on his sofa having a beer and sort of talking but he seems a pretty closed book. He asks a fair few questions about me so I respond enthusiastically about my job blah blah.

I ask him what the plan is… jokingly… there was no plan, he’d wanted me to decide what to do in his city where he was apparently going to show me the bright lights of his domain. Hmmm so far he’s not scoring many points.

When I go on a date I always go dressed ready for action just in case, my nice pretty set from Boux Avenue and hold ups under my pencil skit… hope this wasn’t going to go to waste.

After about half an hour of slightly awkward conversation and me giggling to fill in the silence he moves in for the kiss. Pretty good, I bite him to see what his reaction is, it gets steamy… okay that’s better.

He leads me upstairs to his bedroom which is such a blokes bedroom lol! Bed in the corner, no attention to furniture placement although he’s lit candles already so this was clearly the plan… why didn’t he just say that?

I strip, he pulls of the underwear with no appreciation of the effort gone in, this guy is a little out of practice I think with girls like me. Him being recently divorced I wonder a little if it was like this with his wife. So we go for a bit of a marathon, me showing the benefit of my yoga moves and mess up the sheets. He’s pretty much silent but I think he likes it and he’s pretty good, the right amount of rough, gentle guys who just lie there bore me. Suddenly he pulls out shouting “Oh fuck!” Lots and really loudly, I think oh my god I’ve broken him? No it’s okay he’s just finishing, okay I get it he’s silent till that happens. Phew. I apologise tongue in cheek for making his bed a bit more broken, it was already a bit unstable, like doing it on some sort of moving platform. We get dressed again and go back downstairs, have another beer, watch more darts… he tells me most women don’t react like that and he’s gonna have to put in some serious work down the gym to keep up. Yes you are… I think perhaps watching species when I was younger was a bigger influence on me than I dare to admit.

20 minutes later we’re back up stairs, this time he wants to see my underwear, although it doesn’t stay on long lol! We’re back on the unsteady bed making enough noise to be heard probably down the street. To be fair this guy floats my boat. Although to be honest I still keep thinking about ‘the one’ nothing has ever compared to that guy. And this guy doesn’t seem to be able to banter or want to stay up late and watch films. I’m blatantly trying to find a replacement for something I’m missing just like I did with the ‘stand in’.

So we change the sheets, I double check it’s okay to stay, fully prepared to go stay in a hotel because well I’ve had a couple of beers, it’s a long way home and I’m not 100% sure what this guy had in mind.

He was expecting me to stay, phew that’s okay, I think. We go to bed to sleep this time. And actually I get a decent night’s sleep. Although his bed isn’t as comfortable as mine. I’m not really sure about this guy. So in the morning I say my goodbyes and head home. We’ll see how this one pans out. I think a lot about ‘the one’ when I’m driving home, I do actually miss him a lot. Although I don’t miss the frustration of him always being too busy to spend time with me, and not being able to get his act together. But on a human to human basic level I really don’t think there’s anyone else who fits with me as well as him.

We’ll see how it goes with Mr Elite, he’s more my age which I guess is good, he lives way too far away though and I’m really not sure a long distance relationship is something I want. He’s not really a Mr Grey despite his promises before hand although he has potential.

To be continued….


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